I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
God, you're like boner-b-gone
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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