Texts From Last Night

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  (231): View more from Michigan

  i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.

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  (231): i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am. http://tfl.nu/2854
  Replies (26) Good night (681) Bad night (2730)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting

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  (574): i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting http://tfl.nu/eus0
  Replies (23) Good night (3693) Bad night (1847)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Do you want the good news or bad news first?

  (678): View more from Georgia

  bad news

  (205): View more from Alabama

  The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.

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  (205): Do you want the good news or bad news first? (678): bad news (205): The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos. http://tfl.nu/6wx8
  Replies (17) Good night (4132) Bad night (1697)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone

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  (248): I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone http://tfl.nu/ll67
  Replies (46) Good night (6965) Bad night (2214)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.

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  (248): going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school. http://tfl.nu/hpld
  Replies (30) Good night (6719) Bad night (1345)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving

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  (678): So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving http://tfl.nu/h9li
  Replies (28) Good night (1016) Bad night (8097)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.

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  (847): Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines. http://tfl.nu/j7ab
  Replies (2) Good night (775) Bad night (2252)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives

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  (616): But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives http://tfl.nu/2jnq
  Replies (7) Good night (2024) Bad night (1477)
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  (530): View more from California

  On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.

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  (530): On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite. http://tfl.nu/tnfr
  Replies (9) Good night (4094) Bad night (768)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"

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  (404): This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome" http://tfl.nu/7ky1
  Replies (5) Good night (2861) Bad night (727)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend

  (703): View more from Virginia

  You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.

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  (443): you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend (703): You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence. http://tfl.nu/no32
  Replies (4) Good night (1732) Bad night (611)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera

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  (410): I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera http://tfl.nu/vxvj
  Replies (4) Good night (1160) Bad night (582)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."

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  (402): You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated." http://tfl.nu/111j
  Replies (2) Good night (1308) Bad night (874)
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  (325): View more from Texas

  So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.

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  (325): So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it. http://tfl.nu/zi6y
  Replies (6) Good night (1277) Bad night (498)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.

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  (918): Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize. http://tfl.nu/3mfn
  Replies (2) Good night (618) Bad night (349)

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