i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
no you cant smoke seaweed
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.