how can u be prego again
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
