I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
