Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
