i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
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I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
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We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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