This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
