So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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