Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Use "feeling words"
Yay
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize