so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
