so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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