With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Boobs are out for the taking
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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