Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Randomize