In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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