As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize