You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Randomize
