he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
