I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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