I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
