i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Everclear isn't food dammit
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize