I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
