I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
