that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The Olympian is in my bed
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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