she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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