Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy

(1-313): View more from Michigan

You shut your mouth

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(+44): View more from England

why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??

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(732): View more from New Jersey

last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.

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These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Read it at the TFLN blog
(617): View more from Massachusetts

Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads

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(803): View more from South Carolina

so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.

(843): View more from South Carolina

drunk me is so punny.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head

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(651): View more from Minnesota

Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.

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(820): View more from

Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets

(816): View more from Missouri

Me and I got head

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