I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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