This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
