Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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