My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
