yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
