***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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