I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
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