Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
