are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
