He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
