I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Can I color on your dick again?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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