Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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