matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
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And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
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This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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