i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
