I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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