bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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