My hand turned me down
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
