I need help removing her.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
