my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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