don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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