So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
