since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
