oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Randomize
