so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
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