ugly people sure do ruin things
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i came on her dog
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
