So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
